5 days left until my buddy katie heads out for adventures outside of baltimore. she'll be joining us for turkey day festivities though, so i'm looking forward to that. sad that we aren't having our usual ohio thanksgiving but that means a fun fake thanksgiving will be celebrated sometime next year. can't wait to meet the new baby. it seems so bizarre to me that he looks different than the first child. in my head, i must've thought the new baby would be a replica of his older brother. guess that's generally not how it works.

had a rediculously sleepless night last night. ugh. terrible. was it the 4 spoonfuls of bailey's ice cream 2 hours before bed or leftover stress from the workday? guessing it probably wasn't the ice cream. hm... well, i do seem to be rather busy when my boss is out of town. i think it's a combination of good & bad. feels good to have a lot to do but bad that i don't have support. i actually wallked through a drug deal yesterday on my way to measure a house for trim. strange but probably a pretty regular occurrence in that particular neighborhood.

i think my boyfriend fell asleep on the pot. actually - he's reading about U2. that's all i know.

89 days left

to enjoy the ripe old age of 30. hm. i was telling my brother, jake, i have at least 90 things to do before i turn 31 - but that was yesterday, when i still had 90 days. 89 days is a completely different story. so, what did i accomplish today? i had a not-bad day at work - maybe even a "good" day. but i don't like to go throwing words around... i also took a leisurely walk home, which was really nice. i've been enjoying the fall leaves on my walks to & from work for the past few weeks. today, i gave in. yes, i gave in. i picked up some leaves - because they were so beautiful. i picked them up, just a few, & brought them home with me. only by the time i got home, i wasn't holding just a few - it was a handful. so pretty... i like to press the leaves & use them on cards. but sometimes, my craft-making is very messy & annoying to my roommate/boyfriend/husband, the danners. i'll do better, sweets. promise.

me & the d enjoyed some massages yesterday evening after work. i haven't sleep so well in a long while. completely worth it. why don't we pamper ourselves more often? because, it's damn expensive.

also, completely off the subject, I LOVE CORNBREAD! been enjoying a bit here & there for the past few days & boy, is it delicious. dan's not a fan though. oh well. more for me!!

went to a great yoga class after work this evening. so relaxing. having a gym membership is expensive. but again, totally worth it. i can pamper myself w/ exercise & relaxation as often as i like. good stuff. (why don't they have massage clubs?)

with the next big birthday quickly approaching & our 3rd anniversary behind us, i've been thinking about some goals/things to focus on. not in order of importance:

• better communication in my relationships
  
• make more of an effort w/ friends - everyone has moved away or is moving away & the social circle can't get much smaller... eek.
• voice lessons - i've got some good leads & one possibility at the moment
• relaxation & breathing - this one is a constant struggle, especially with the new job. sounds rediculous, needing to focus on breathing. but i swear, when i'm tense, i am an incredibly shallow breather & sometimes i stop breathing all together. yoga is good for practicing deep breathing & relaxation. i hope at some point it will carry over into the world outside of class. a life goal.
• being myself, to a large degree, all the time.

mmm.... cornbread.

into the tame

another quiet monday off. thank god. saturday was the height of craziness at work, thus far anyway. went to yoga this morning. so nice, just walking down the street to class. we meet in the sanctuary of this old church that's being renovated - no pews, just random couches & chairs & things... it's a great space for yoga. nothing like lying on your back in the middle of a big church & seeing the sunrise through the clerestory windows.

spent last night doing some cooking for the week. i've been making some poor dinner choices since i started this job. just don't have the energy to cook & i don't seem to care. so last night i cooked up a huge pot of chili (really, it's HUGE - thanks, mom, for the big pot) & put together a vege lasagne for later in the week.

our 3rd anniversary is coming up later this week. bizarre. i no longer think it's weird that we're married. for a long time, the idea of being married & knowing we were, was so bizarre. not no more. maybe it came with the new job. i'm definitely not one of the "young" people & that's odd. i still feel young though, except for the 9:30 bedtime. :)

stopped by the garden today. looks like someone's done a little digging in my compost pile. maybe they'll kick me out for bringing kitchen scraps to the garden. hope not. i have to take them somewhere...

experimenting with black beans

they're fresh, as in not dried. got 'em from the farmers market this weekend. cookin' em up for dinner. i hope they're tasty. i've had katie's fresh black beans a few times & of course they were delicious. who knows how mine will turn out though...?

welcome to adam grass & jack steinmetz! seriously, everyone's popping out babies - although i bet their mom's might phrase it differently. welcome, babies!!!

think i'm finally settling into the job a little more. it's been rough at times, i won't deny it. the joy of working 6 days in a row is having the following monday off. what a treat! i enjoy monday's off much more than saturday's off. on a monday, the world seems pretty quiet (except for traffic on our street). i can go out & do things (like shopping) & want to kill myself a little less because stores aren't swarmed by everyone & their mother - THEY'RE AT WORK!! it's so great!! few things turn my stomach as much as stores full of people. you do have to make peace with the slow, poor driving of many old folks though. in my book, it's totally worth it. & it feels ok just to take it easy. there's no one else to hang out with & sometimes, that's exactly what i need.

anyway, i had a leisurely monday (after a short trip to work that i'm pretending never happened). went to yoga, sat around in the sun & read the book i've been struggling to get through (for a book club i'm trying), had some lunch, caught up on some e-mails, went to the garden for a bit & got the emissions inspection on the car. an all around good day.

i finally had time to attempt another compost pile at the garden. i've been taking our food scraps (non-animal scraps) to katie's compost bin, but seeing as she's leaving, i needed a new spot. so i dumped it on the garden plot next to ours, which has been abandoned for the winter & i piled it high with wood chips. boy did it smell - it was pretty horrible. hope they don't kick me out for stinky compost.

guess that's about it. getting a bit of a cold, i think. a sign that i haven't been taking good care of myself. dan was so sick last winter, like he was dying, & i didn't even get a little sick. hm... i'm on the market for a voice teacher & i've got a few leads. my new bedtime seems to be (eek!) 9:30pm. wacky. but it seems to work somehow. i'm old.

my dog has fleas....

me & maw & ricky elz waitin' fer the subway.

maybe i've been busy or maybe i've been lazy. think it's a little of both. i've realized how pointless this blog-thing is... i don't think it's accomplishing my original goal of helping to keep in touch with people at all.

work's been going ok. a little frustrating. i have issues with one person in particular. maybe it's just me. without being too specific, there's one person i interact with who's the opposite of helpful EVERY DAY. or, every time i have a question. one time, in response to my casual question, this person said, "What are you talking about!?" so... that's been fun.

we had this semi-formal fundraiser last friday... it wasn't too bad. i was feeling nervous about the attire - "casual coctail" - so i headed over to katies for some advice. it was the best part of the day by far! she & her sister had me try on lots of different things from both of their closets. it was exactly how i've always imagined life with sisters to be. i carpooled & one person dropped out, so i drove the polish guy who practices brazilian jujitsu. i started to feel like i was on some kind of wierd blind date since dan didn't go. but that eventually passed. the food was interesting - mashed potatoes served in martini glasses, that kind of thing. thank god for my supervisor's wife. we get along pretty well, so we had lots of time to chat.

hm... ricky elz was in visiting for the weekend. it was a good time. our quick trip to nyc was a bit too quick. the drive ended up being quite a bit longer than i thought & we got back super late. it was good to see maw though. it's been about 2 years since the last time we drove up, i think. wish she'd move back to balto.

trying to read a book called "The History Of Love" for a book club i might join. it was sooo good for the first 50 or so pages. sadly, it's become much less good.

i did make it for a second trip down to the solar decathlon. if i have time in the near future, i may post some pictures. it was really inspiring. if building something like that was a requirement for all masters programs, i'd be in school tomorrow. unfortunately, i think it'll take more time to find a school that emphasises building as much as sustainable design.

my dog doesn't really have fleas. i don't have a dog. but our apartment may have fleas thanks to a visit from some flea infested shoes. another reason to be glad we live in a carpet free environment!!

you can do it, duffy moon

a few short months ago, i was moaning & groaning that i was BORED BORED BORED with work & other things. everyone else (not literally) seemed to be moving, having babies, or both, while we were holed up in baltimore doing who the hell knows what. time has passed, as it tends to do, & we're still here. some things have changed & some haven't. funny how one often wants what one doesn't have. never satisfied. i started a new job with lots of possibility. only then did i realize how great certain parts of my old job really were, namely the easy relationship i had with my boss. he made me bat-shit crazy sometimes but... a lot of the things that inspire me about the new job are all the possibilities for change. it seems like an uphill battle & i find myself feeling bored more of the time than i thought i'd be on my 4th week. why am i always bored? it's not like i'm the brilliant kid in class who already knows how to do everything. maybe i should just get the tv fixed. then i don't have to spend any time thinking about life & what i could be doing with it. i could just watch some crap as the hours disappear. hm. turns out, the easy way isn't always the best way. discomfort can inspire growth, i think.

had an enlightening discussion with a coworker on the way home from work today. turns out i'm not the only one who finds a prominent member of the staff to be disingenuous. good to know.

that's about it, really. d went with me to water the garden this evening. it's looking ok although i think the squirrels have ravaged quite a few of the seeds. my attempted fall / winter crops include: lettuce, spinach, kale, collards, carrots, beets & green onions. still have a few jalapeno & bell pepper plants growing like crazy. what to do with all the jalapenos?? katie suggests making green chilis. maybe....

& some things stay the same: we still have lots of rats, crime, few trees & little grass

Solar Decathlon

what a day... gorgeous. walked to the farmers mkt after jake & melissa left. got us some goodies. it was a great walk - part of it was along the marathon route, so there were lots of folks out on the street cheering & hanging out on their porches, playing music, handing out snacks & water to runners. i didn't see any runners until i was on my way home. i was just walking along enjoying the music, smiling people & warm sun on my face when i heard cheering. this man with a huge grin passed me by. he wasn't running though... he had some sort of hand-pedaled tricycle. a paraplegic. i was overcome with emotion for some reason. he looked so happy, grinning from ear to ear. i wanted to call out to him & cheer him on but i knew he wouldn't be able to hear me & my arms were full of goodies so i couldn't wave either. i don't have any idea how he had enough power in his arms to go 26 miles ... after he passed, i thought, "maybe i should do the marathon next year" - walk it, i mean. my knees aren't up for running & neither is the rest of me. maybe dan'd wanna go too? guess we'll have to wait & see.

i was awful slow getting back out of the house for DC. i had about 2 hours to walk around the Solar Decathlon before it closed for the day. made it through 3 houses. i'd like to go back & i'm trying to figure out when that would be possible. might do it monday afternoon... i usually hate crowds, but there was something about the energy of the students & visitors. excitement. inspiration. felt a little bit like, "these are my people," if you know what i mean. i hope it's possible to work on a house for the decathlon when i go back to school.

best get this kitchen cleaned up before dan gets home.... or my good wife status will be no more.